Need Time to Think

So a week of spring semester under the belt, and now I'm getting a bit in a rush again. Physics is being difficult again. Gah. The concepts are quite intriguing, but I need to read. no fun. Then I attended an extra math section today. Good stuff
I did play a lot of tennis these past few days. Awesome :] My right hand is somewhat bruised, hehe, but still, tennis is fun. I hope I get to play more if studying permits.
I finally got around to vacuuming the floor in my room. It's quite tidy, surprisingly, at least a corner of it. Still need to clean out the closet. Time to switch sheets too, or at least.

Not that much happened though since I last wrote. I attended prayer meeting last Tuesday, and I look forward to it again tomorrow. Also, we went to Alameda on Friday night after Ray's message. ice cream and cookies. mmmhhm! We played lots of Korean slapping games.< haha. and Four men on the couch. interesting game. Need to play more. O yes, yesterday, and a few times already, I've gone to CKC to eat dinner too.

I haven't really sat down to have a quite time, and I've been rather tired. Uh oh. I've been trying to keep up DT as much as possible. I think I need to spend more time thinking over that too. Yesterday there were three more baptisms at GP. Quite interestingly, the brothers had very similar testimonies. Should I work on mine? Think think think...

Made Clear

So today's session was a lot more about relationships, but also about the Gospel message itself. Things that I remember fresh in my mind are the womb scenario, the testimonies of confrontation of sin. Some made me see more clearly about who I was kidding. Myself.

While I did participate in games, I did enjoy for the first time, walking around along the bottom of a moist forested area. It felt cool and refreshing, and then to walk wn to a small creek where the was was shallow enough to let the light reflect clearly through to the bottom, awesome. Watching the ropes course, I later thought about it, once we tie our lives to Jesus and we commit our lives to him, he can then control our lives and hold us when we fall, guiding us, supporting us down life's zipline. However, as in the ropes course, we cannot be passive recipients of that rope of love. We need to buckle ourselves to it and hold on. Even when we go to a new series of challenges on the course, we are still connected to that rope. It hopes us.

To summarize Pastor Ed's and the Gracepoint community attitude towards relationships, dating relationships should solely be for the sake for marriage. The dating and pickup culture that the world now espouses is a failure to build boundaries and protect ourselves and others from unnecessary harm, both physical and emotional. This being the core of this reasoning, there are also the reasons to remain sexually pure, devoted to same-sex non-romantic relationships because these will become the people we rely on when things get tough, especially in a marriage. "we can't be platonic about relationships and say we need those deeper guy/girl relationships." Through the years, this unique church culture has been sustained at Gracepoint. It will take time to adjust my mindset. Indeed it will.

No one wants to admit their sins, but once we do, we can then confront and hopefully, change. I never thought of it this way, but God stakes out sins in all of their distasteful language not so that we will avoid that they exist, but to admit that we are guilty of committing them. Once we admit and repent, then he can save us, the requirement to salvation is to be a sinner. Only when we admit can we be saved. It's simple, yet hard for so many people because of pride, because of the shame, guilt, and secrecy that we are afraid to release into the open. I therefore made a conscious decision, today, to admit my sins, my shortcomings, my prideful heart. I wrote a commitment card, but sadly, it wasn't read. Nevertheless, I made a decision of re-dedication. Maybe tomorrow.

Relationships

This past week went by so quickly. I can't believe school starts this Tuesday. Where did my break go? Coming back to Berkeley has fun, though I spent my first afternoon pretty much alone and again on Friday, I has several hours to myself, I was able to get my room back in shape, clean house for a bit and get some things ready for school. I watched more Kdrama to splurge the time. This time it was Tokyo Showers, about lost love and still being able to be happy afterwards despite that. A short piece, but touching nonetheless.

Thursday's snow trip was exciting. I slept over at Dana house the night before to be ready to leave for Sierra Lodge on the morning. We didnt go to a snowpark but playing at Sierra Lodge in the light rain was still fun. Snow was deep enough to fall into. haha. Hill sleds, igloo making, the dogpiling I didn't participate in, snowball fights...the best was the igloo making. I never thought compacting snow would be that difficult. Lunch at 3 was great, shredded pork and beef barley soup. Tasty and very filling.

Then today, it was the first day of Gracepoint's Winter Retreat. Having experienced the retreat at home, and the Thanksgiving Retreat just two months ago, I was a bit more prepared for what went on. Game time wasn't too exciting, but it was interesting seeing so many people run around on a field playing a game together. Cuban Ruban and Quack quack. :] Then rest of the time was testimony and message sessions with lunch and dinner. Those were ok, not the best, but good seeing how we're at a retreat site. It wasn't all that bad though. Good dessert

So the messages. Pastor Ed's first message about the Word and how we need to delve in it in order to be able to take action. He talked about Words, and what the Word is about. It's a prescription that we have to take in order for the Word to have any effect. We need to take action on what we learn. I was wondering though, what do we need to take action on. Which of the things do we focus on...I guess it's just starting somewhere with reading the Word, and it'll come naturally once I try to reflect about it and memorize, something Kelly said. That reminds me, does being a good Christian mean memorizing=equipping ourselves for every good work-verses in the BIble?

Hm...So many other topics we covered today, dating and marriage late this evening, temptations and distractions in pron, media, tv, and gaming, and character. Making boundaries was the main topic of today and I guess if we do set those boundaries, if I set those boundaries, things can really change for the better. I had several qualms about the relationship topic, but I think I'm getting a better understanding about it, the time issue, the broken relationships, and all the other things that they mentioned. I'll have to ponder more.

"We're all in this alone,"

He said with a groan.

That's what I had thought,

but tis apparently not.

We just need to wait

and before it's too late,

God said He will provide

someone by our side.

There's a great girl there;

she's honest, I swear

Then I see the separation

in this personal relation.

If we're not together,

we'll know no better

and relationships, they just

break the surface. Then rust.

I am not saying I need that,

or else life would be flat.

But I like les amis femmes

because you can talk with em.

Sometimes speech with guys-

it's as annoying as flies.

We'll have have to see,

what life has in hold for me.

Plan B

This past week has been not too exciting. I watched a bunch of kdrama and other videos online. I started and finished Fugitive Plan B. Quite an interesting one. Again there was a theme at the end, though there were a few throughout. Things about the second generation being better, hopefully, ending revenge from previous generations, things about showing love when we can before it's too late... One big point was about trusting people. There are those we can trust, and many who, if we know will mess with us, we can't... sounds easy, but strangely we still do.

I also drove a lot this past week. After watching dmv vids about driving, it helps, but I need lots of practice. haha.

School starts in two weeks. :X what to prep for now? more java or rev the math. Or....start cs hw. hm. what to do? what to do? I hope I have time to go to UCLA this weekend, or maybe Monday... hm

So 2011, it's started rather slowly. I've had lots of time with dad this past week. We're home alone. haha. Cooking veggies, eggs, and making rice. I need to cook more. gotta practice more. xD dry rice. tasteless eggs. understeamed eggs. some things were good though~

I got a new netbook. EeePC by Asus. :D works well, though I'm confused how many hours it really has. it said 107hrs once. right now 55% 6hr 34minutes. hm, sounds good. Gotta upgrade to Windows 7 Profesh, Word 2010. FREE when school starts